Building self-esteem involves reprogramming negative thoughts and feelings about yourself. We cannot simply replace the negative statements. They have been living with us for a long time; for some, a lifetime. Using affirmations can help change these negative thoughts and allow you to consciously and subconsciously focus on the positive, which is a valuable tool in building self-esteem.
How Affirmations Work
Without even re
alizing it, we tell ourselves negative statements more frequently then positives. Negative self-talk is part of low self-esteem, and when these thoughts are repeated over and over again, they become our reality. By using the power of affirmations and repeating them daily, you can recondition your thoughts and change how you think and feel about any situation.
alizing it, we tell ourselves negative statements more frequently then positives. Negative self-talk is part of low self-esteem, and when these thoughts are repeated over and over again, they become our reality. By using the power of affirmations and repeating them daily, you can recondition your thoughts and change how you think and feel about any situation.
A friend of mine constantly put herself down. She tells herself she is not skinny enough, pretty enough, and frequently belittles herself for any decision she makes. She creates negativity with these thoughts about herself. Instead of saying, “I deserved that piece of pizza and I am proud of myself for only having one slice, she says “I am pathetic and I am never going to be in shape. I may as well eat the whole pie.” When we begin using affirmations in our daily lives, our thoughts and decisions are altered, making us live in a more loving and beautiful mindset.
How to Use Affirmations
- Start with a direct statement of a positive change you want to make in your life. Willingness to change is the first step you need in order to actually make any substantial shift An alternative is to affirm that you are becoming something or learning to do something. For my friend it may be “I am learning to love and take care of my body.”
- An affirmation should be short, simple, and direct. “I believe in myself” or “I am an amazing person.”
- Keep them in the present tense. “I am important” or present progressive tense – “I am learning to love myself.” Telling yourself that some change will happen in the future makes it harder to believe.
- Make sure you read them allowed multiple times a day. You can write them on your bathroom mirror so it is the first and last thing you see during the day. You can also write on note cards and keep them in your car or in your bag or have an alarm set in your phone that displays it at certain times a day.
- Avoid saying negatives. Instead of saying “ I am no longer worried about speaking in public.” Try “I am becoming fearless about speaking in public.” Imagine yourself doing this in this positive tense.
The best way to reinforce affirmation is by repetition and really trying to feel this to be true for you. Ask yourself, what would this feel like if I was feeling confident, loved, whatever affirmation rings true for you.
Examples of Affirmations
- I am becoming healthier everyday
- I love myself
- I am a great _________
- I am worthy of love
- I am a confident and beautiful person
Create your own affirmation or find one that applies to something you are struggling with in the moment. When you begin to use affirmations as a tool, you will build your self-esteem.
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